Not all of my bad experiences in dating have come from meeting dating site people. Actually I have met some lovely people, who didn't like me or I wasn't into dating via dating sites. Sometimes you drive right into a dating scenario.
So, I commute 40ish minutes to work and home each day. As a result of being a incessant optimist, I am always late. Speeding happens. It is my fault and as I have ever gotten caught, I know it is my fault and take my shame ticket. That morning, was one such morning. Speeding down the interstate and I see the lights behind me. Damn.
I pull over and get my information ready. He comes around to my passenger window because of the speeding vehicles on the other side. I roll the window down and hand him my information. We go through the "Do you know why I pulled you over" song and dance. I know what is coming and I own up to my speeding.
Suddenly he is coughing like he forgot to keep his lungs on the inside. I had a fresh bottle of water in my passenger seat, so I hand it to him. He gulps down about half of it and finally is able to catch his breath. I am glad because I didn't want to get in trouble for killing a cop when the dude couldn't breathe in the first place.
After he has his air where it should be and has working lungs again. He tries to hand the half drank water bottle back to me. I am not quite sure what he thought I was going to do with it at that point. So joking I said "Nah, you keep it, you can just get the next drink." Look how witty I am!
"Seriously?" - Him a little surprised
"Um... sure." - Me not sure what he is surprised by
"So, like how about Friday?" - Him mentally thinking through his social calendar.
"Oh, ummm... Yea, that works for me." - Wait, what?
All of a sudden we were exchanging cell numbers and I had a date. As I got back on the interstate towards work I realized that, while I had a date, I had no speeding ticket!
WTF! Is my life a movie now? Who does this happen to? I had to tell the world so, I told facebook. My friends also couldn't believe my life.
On Friday, he messaged me to make sure we were still on for that night, and he asked where I wanted to eat. I chose a semi nice place that we could both drive to. That planned I was anxious for this. He was fit, and handsome. Probably about my age. This could be fun, and what a story would it be if it worked out and we got married!
After work I gussied up and drove to the restaurant. There he was waiting outside. There was a short wait and as we waited on the bench outside, I asked him if we could take a picture together. I had many people interested in how our date was going to go, and thought it would be fun to share.
"Aren't you a bit old for that?" - With disdain on his face...
"Oh, well I just thought it would be fun." Don't tell me 30 is to old for selfies! "I am going to use the restroom before we head in."
From there I went to the restroom, because twitter, and shared my moment.
From there the date just went down hill. While he was a gentleman in his actions and such, he wasn't a fan of anything I was. "You teach science, most of that is brain washing the kids. I am a Christian." (So was I?) "Theater? that is for drama queens and gays." Erm... And so on till I decided to focus on my grilled chicken and mashed potatoes.
As the night came to a close and we were heading to our individual cars,
"So, you want to come back to my place?" He asks...
"Um, no." Did he not hear our conversation in there?
"You aren't going to want to see me again, are you?" He finally realizes.
"Thank you for dinner, and the evening, but that would be a no." Duh
He kind of nodded and walked away. So much for my awesome wedding story. Welp, it was bed for me. I was proctoring the ACT's the next morning and was anxious to tell my evening to my friends.
PS - I have cut back on my speeding a ton. If he pulls me over again, I am pretty sure I am screwed.
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